* Every Version of Me *

I am not proud of who I have become.

I am proud of every version of myself.

The little girl

who was constantly sad and scared,

lonely and broken,

trying to make sense of a world

that didn’t feel safe.

The teenager

who was traumatised

and tried so hard to be liked,

who learned to shrink and bend

just to belong somewhere.

The young adult

who was strong and capable

but used and abused,

who kept going even when love

kept hurting her.

I am so proud that she didn’t give up.

At times she wanted to.

Once she almost did.

I am proud of the woman

who stayed when she felt unable and who survived anyway and didn't give up on love.

I am proud of the mother

who kept choosing her children

over her own exhaustion.

I am proud of the woman

who kept learning,

kept healing,

kept softening

instead of hardening.

I am not proud of who I have become

as if she replaced the others.

I am proud of every version of me

that refused to disappear.

©️ 2026 Annmarie Brennan